R

Time flies...

It's almost 4 months since my last post. Where was I man (x.x)

Many things have happened. Many things haven't. One thing's for sure, I can never take anything back. Not that I want to though. Sometimes, it's the truth that I've hidden so deep in me, that when they push me over the limit, it just blows. I don't blurb out words that I don't mean. There's many things I don't say because I know people don't like to hear the truth. I choose my words quite carefully, I would say. Guess intensity does play a part too. 25 years is sort of enough. They matter, that's why I have such intense emotions. I tried, but one person's effort is never enough. Now that I've put my mind to start from a clean sheet, I believe everything will be better. What have they done for me? All the things I have sacrificed for them, although I don't remind them, I don't think they appreciated it. I rarely feel like part of their community. Perhaps when I wasn't so good, they take pity on me. But when I'm good, they never fail to bring me down. "Don't forget last time you....", "Don't forget last time I helped you...", "Just because you study better, you think you are better than me?" etc. Ask anyone and they know I have never compared academics. It's really confusing why they even mention this and put the blame on me. I hear their insecurities now. That's why you always exclude. You want to be the "popular" one. Go ahead. Well, if you think you're the only one helping others, and your weird ways are THE WAY to go. Good for you. I am not going to be part of this weird community anymore. It feels strange now. A lost-lessness. A newfound freedom. But I guess every new phase results in this peculiar feeling. I know that they will be cursing me, like they never fail to remind me. But as the saying goes "out of sight, out of mind".

I believe I've said this before: I really look forward to the christmas season, because of all the pretty decorations and possible presents I could receive. This time round it's gonna be quite different. Just keeping my fingers crossed. 

"A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together." - Garrison Keillor

The first time I went for 推拿, I got kneaded like a bread by someone that felt like they had 'the rock' like kind of muscles. It was....beyond pain. But hey, no pain no gain isn't it?

"The one key is trust."

Once broken, it's hard to open because the only person who makes the key, is me - by yours truly.

Other than the key runners, I think that people here don't usually get to find a job that corresponds to their hobbies. Sad, but that's life - you'll never get what you want. UNLESS...if you put some effort to it than maybe...MAYBE there might be some silver lining. For me, my determination has somewhat faltered and priorities shuffled. I was a career-minded person. Now...not so much. Money should not be the priority. Instead, happiness should. Working at an unhappy place can be very tiring and mentally draining. Any amount you get in return, just sucks more life out of you. But we can't go income-less too, because we have a responsibility to be independent. So what I've realised is, we should go for something we have interest in. Money may not be good, but at least we are not short-changing our souls. We become happier, and we feel better. That's soul-enriching and something we can never get back once we commit ourselves to the jobs we hate for the higher pay. Staying happy is much better than money, believe me.

On another job-related note, I saw an article which may be an inspiration for us to continue pursue that hobby that we sometimes set aside for good for jobs that we hate, and well, knitting rocks! Click on image to read the story, enjoy!

"Don't quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion" - Muhammad Ali

Today (yesterday since it's past 12mn), was a real shitty day for me. Imagine a day where everything went wrong. Well, you probably imagined 50% of what my day was like. And because this is a complain post, I am going to talk about anything, big or small...

(1)

It started with the previous night, I could not get a good night sleep because people were not considerate enough to off the TV sound because they wanted light at night as they were afraid of the dark.

(2)

Then came the part where I forgot to take my stuff home...luckily, with good service on their part, I managed to get my stuff back.

(3)

Now come the interesting part, I get accused of something that the accuser do not have evidence for. Yep, 3 chances to give evidence, but failed at all 3. Yet the damage is done.

(4)

After that, on a playful part, a confrontation with a stranger occurred. The stranger's stance was to bring on a fight. Mental case this one. As civilised adult, a fight did not occur in spite of the mind-slap that was given. These people, should learn to be more gracious. Gosh.

(5)

Followed by a call regarding a sales person mistake...that I, as the customer, have to pay?

(6)

Then another pep talk, with no real conclusion.

(7)

Opened an email from a service provider, with super bad service attitude. Service standards are dropping way to low. Should I rebut? Should I not? Still deciding...But anyway, I pray that this service officer will not stay in this position, he/she is totally unfit for this position.

(8)

Lastly, having a slight headache for the whole day because of all the nonsense. Last time I had a similar headache, was a few years ago. Why. WHy. WHY must these all happen, on the same day still.

Yup, boom boom boom! From start to the end. Got so suay anot. Haisss =(

Anyways, a really informative video to watch...

To celebrate the end of the last paper for the semester, we scouted for a new place to explore and dine. This place is near the area we frequent but we never knew it existed. Now, we should be going there more often to try out other dining options as well! Anyways, here are some items we picked off the menu:

Really happy & excited that June is coming, but at the same time quite sad that my pre-attachment is coming to an end... I was really starting to enjoy it, but someone just had to come into the picture to spoil all the fun. Well, that's life. Nothing ever goes smoothly, especially when you're mee! maggi mee.

(>.<)

Anyways, I've recently participated in a competition. It's quite interesting actually, plus my first time doing something like this, so maybe I shall post the link here if there's result. Remember to *watch this space* yep!
One of the reasons I have this blog is for me to have a space to rant and hopefully vent some anger in the process. Because I've noticed, speaking to people bores them (it's not their problem) and their inattention (on purpose or otherwise) would make me ask myself : why did i even try it in the first place. Switching up the volume of the radio or cutting in with another non-related topic? Makes me wonder...hais
And another thing which I have been keeping in my mind, is about who we call friends. I believe friends are people who respect your decisions, no matter their own perceptions. I have always thought many people as my friends. But then when the real test comes, some fail, badly too. Why did I say this? Because I once told friends about a personal decision, and even reminded them time and again not to spread (yep, quite embarrassed to have to remind them about this). Thinking that because I have verbally reminded them, my secret is safe with them. Nope, not the case. Some questioned my want to keep a low-profile. Well, firstly it's my business. Secondly, these people are usually the ones that always hide their own affairs and are secretive about their own stuff. Talk about hypocrites. Thirdly, why can't you just respect your friend's decision? Not like it will affect you in any way what-so-ever. Most obviously, I am a low-profile person. But how did I came to realise my 'business' was leaked? I was at the first scene when I was taiji-ed a question someone asked my "friend". The question topic? The secret I never wanted to share with strangers. I received the second leak through a phone call. The caller was an insurance agent, a friend of "friend no. 2", informing me about my business, which I have never told anyone other than people I thought were my friends. A few other minor incidents happened during this period, not significant to mention. Final showdown was at a gathering. It was filled with a mix of people, a few of them who will make true friends, and then the rest "friends". Bluntly, I was asked about my 'business' by someone I never told it to.  They call it the "tell it all" session. Well, I highly doubt "that" few person revealed the whole truth about themselves, especially regarding my topic, and especially for the person who questioned my need to keep my business private. Seriously, hypocrite to the max. So, I've learnt many lessons over the process. Most important one of all, who are the real friends. Karma also tells me that friends of that person(s), should be wary of that person(s). Maybe they're okay being betrayed, that's why they're still friends. Or maybe they're not. Well, I have to admit it's my fault too that I want to share the news with people I thought were my friends. Now I know better. "We don't lose friends, we just learn who the real ones are." I liked you much better in the past.
Feels abit better now that I have let it out. Okay, I like to end on a good note, so I'm posting this really touching & inspiring video. Hope it inspires something good in ya'll:

We will forever be in debt to this great man, and the woman behind this man.

"You do your best and reach your peak in that job. Whether you're a craftsman, whatever you are, be the best that you can be" - my nation's founding father, LKY

It's something everyone agrees is good to do, but most doesn't.

It's something I did a lot because I am me, and got 'scolded' for.

It's something that showed me who would stand up for me when I was being 'bullied', who I really am grateful to have as a partner.

It's something I did more often before I started to see the negative aspects of people.

It's something I like to make people I go out with do.

It's something I do (a lot) when I'm with the people I love.

"Science teaches us to think, but love teaches us to smile" - Santosh Kalwar

Spread the love.

(•‿•)

As I grow older, my CNY busy-ness seems to falter...wonder if it's a good thing or a bad thing because now I have lots of time to myself, but sometimes I feel like I am just wasting my time away. Anyway, I really hope them people get their rightful karma. They are sucking away my positive energies. I will be damn happy to say "Adios" to these people once and for all because my life suck because of you.

Happy Lunar New Year to one and all!

This festive period is really something that I look forward to because we are given 2 full days of time-off from our work lives, get to catch up with people that are important to us in a way or another, and also get some extra pocket money heh heh...It can be quite hectic though, especially in the case of my family where we tend to really visit all my relatives (which would usually take a period of 4 days to complete), not including my parents' friends' places and sometimes gathering with my friends. Butt...it's nice to really see all the people have some time to have fun together and not be bugged down by the daily work/out-of-work stresses =)

Anyways, I came across this really interesting project that gives people from poorer families a chance to own a bike (see video below). Not only will it be a revolutionary transportation in the third-world country, I also really liked the artistic and altruistic side of it - to make something functional out of cardboards for people who do not do as well as you. I'm sure the time and effort spent into making the bike exceeds the amount that's listed, so really, kudos to all these people who are willing to go that extra mile to brighten up someone else's day. My resolution for the world for 2015 will be that everyone will be more altruistic and give more than they expect to receive (one of my principles of life). And I also hope that any one who owes others money will return the money before CNY ends. That will be quite simple to attain as long as we know our limits and not aspire to enjoy beyond our budgets.

"The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it" - Jordan Belfort

Here's wishing all a goat year ahead! ;)

'Interesting' will be the word that describes my past week, a thing that has evaded my work life for a while now. Even though the process is tough and I've met some nasty people, I enjoyed the learning aspects and am really grateful that my mentor is much more helpful than that previous one, who only wants to push all the work to me and rush off to lunch or get home. Okay, shall stop the complaining, not good for my health ya =P

Anyways, Valentine's Day & CNY is around the corner! Looking forward to the latter one because of the loong break *heh heh* tata!

"If you think adventure is dangerous, try routine: it's deadly" - Daniele Quercia

It's 2015.

And I'm looking forward to the future...looking to find something that I'll like. Difficult, says the options and advises. But as the saying goes, if you never try, you'll never know. So kampate to everyone out there who's trying, let's take a leap of faith and have an exciting year ahead!

♥

☮

"Do not stand down there at the bottom of a range of mountains wondering which one should you climb because most of it is above the clouds and you do not know if you will find something on the top. Just start climbing one that you find most exciting and challenging...the more you climb, the better your understanding of who you are and what you want - often do not want." - Xu Beixi